j.p.undercroft

You're distracting me from you

2 notes

kanerd:

I think my favorite part of the entire movie is the all-knowing omniscient bartender

“You speak French?” “Oui.”

I love this so much. Someday I’d like to find a girl who loves this movie enough that she’d go on a Groundhog Day date with me. Like, we go into the bar together, and as soon as I say the wrong thing, we “rewind” and walk backwards out of the bar, then come back in five seconds later in as we did in the beginning and repeat all our lines up til the point where I said the “wrong” thing and I change it, etc. See how long it takes before someone asks what the hell we’re doing.

45 notes

Every time I see this gif (and I track the Charlie Bartlett tag so I see it often) I feel the need to say something. It grates on my nerves, and it’s finally come time to say it. Don’t get me wrong, I love this movie. And I think the dialogue is excellent, and I believe that this is what Anton Yelchin’s character would say in this moment in the movie, as he’s trying - as a boy who is himself very lost and alone in the world - to help someone who is insecure with herself to be more secure. And I think it’s a beautiful line, within the context of the film. But as a think to say, on its own, to be repeated over the internet as a sort of proverb, I find it problematic. “It’s kind of a turnoff when a girl isn’t cool with being herself.” My problem is that the statement focuses on whether or not a girl is “turning on” or “turning off” guys. Now - while many of us (I don’t mean guys, I mean people in general) wanna get laid, and want people to wanna get laid desiring us specifically to share that pleasant, carnal act with, and our capacity to turn others on directly impacts our opportunities to get laid, and by definition the desires of others for us specifically as individuals - this isn’t why we should have self esteem and confidence. We don’t do it to impress other people. If we’re doing it to impress other people, we’re catering to what qualities we perceive others to desire in us, so it’s not true confidence or self-esteem at all. Should you be cool with being yourself? In most cases, yes. You’ll be happier if you’re cool with being yourself. Often times it’s easier to make friends if you’re cool with being yourself. Also, if you’re cool with who you are, you won’t need other people so much. You’ll have more freedom. You’ll have a greater capacity to accomplish what you want to in life. But you don’t need to do anything because it will or will not turn someone on, or turn someone off. You don’t owe it to anyone to be sexually appealing to them. Because your sex appeal is for you. I don’t mean, you go all Narcissus on yourself and start masturbating in front of a mirror (unless that’s your thing, in which case, go get ‘em tiger). I mean that you should only focus on being sexually appealing if it’s going to get you something that you want. When you wear something that seems to make you look hot, if you dedicate yourself to toning up or slimming down or beefing up or embellishing some curves, if you get a haircut, if you buy a new bra or a new dress or a new suit or some tight jeans, if you put on some makeup or keep it natural, if you move your hips and pout those lips… don’t do it to appease someone else, don’t do it because you’re “supposed” to be attractive for other people. Only do it because (if) it gives you more power to achieve your goals. Same goes for being comfortable with who you are as a person. You are who you are. Don’t “be cool with who you are” because you being uncool with who you are makes other people uncomfortable. Fuck ‘em. It’s your call whether or not you like who you are or wanna change who you are. Don’t let people tell you that you should want to change, and don’t let people tell you that you should just accept who you already are. If you are getting what you want out of life, good. If you aren’t getting what you want, and think that changing something about yourself is going to help you get what you want, then do that.

Every time I see this gif (and I track the Charlie Bartlett tag so I see it often) I feel the need to say something. It grates on my nerves, and it’s finally come time to say it.

Don’t get me wrong, I love this movie. And I think the dialogue is excellent, and I believe that this is what Anton Yelchin’s character would say in this moment in the movie, as he’s trying - as a boy who is himself very lost and alone in the world - to help someone who is insecure with herself to be more secure. And I think it’s a beautiful line, within the context of the film.

But as a think to say, on its own, to be repeated over the internet as a sort of proverb, I find it problematic.

“It’s kind of a turnoff when a girl isn’t cool with being herself.”

My problem is that the statement focuses on whether or not a girl is “turning on” or “turning off” guys. Now - while many of us (I don’t mean guys, I mean people in general) wanna get laid, and want people to wanna get laid desiring us specifically to share that pleasant, carnal act with, and our capacity to turn others on directly impacts our opportunities to get laid, and by definition the desires of others for us specifically as individuals - this isn’t why we should have self esteem and confidence. We don’t do it to impress other people. If we’re doing it to impress other people, we’re catering to what qualities we perceive others to desire in us, so it’s not true confidence or self-esteem at all.

Should you be cool with being yourself? In most cases, yes. You’ll be happier if you’re cool with being yourself. Often times it’s easier to make friends if you’re cool with being yourself. Also, if you’re cool with who you are, you won’t need other people so much. You’ll have more freedom. You’ll have a greater capacity to accomplish what you want to in life.

But you don’t need to do anything because it will or will not turn someone on, or turn someone off. You don’t owe it to anyone to be sexually appealing to them.

Because your sex appeal is for you. I don’t mean, you go all Narcissus on yourself and start masturbating in front of a mirror (unless that’s your thing, in which case, go get ‘em tiger). I mean that you should only focus on being sexually appealing if it’s going to get you something that you want. When you wear something that seems to make you look hot, if you dedicate yourself to toning up or slimming down or beefing up or embellishing some curves, if you get a haircut, if you buy a new bra or a new dress or a new suit or some tight jeans, if you put on some makeup or keep it natural, if you move your hips and pout those lips… don’t do it to appease someone else, don’t do it because you’re “supposed” to be attractive for other people. Only do it because (if) it gives you more power to achieve your goals.

Same goes for being comfortable with who you are as a person. You are who you are. Don’t “be cool with who you are” because you being uncool with who you are makes other people uncomfortable. Fuck ‘em. It’s your call whether or not you like who you are or wanna change who you are. Don’t let people tell you that you should want to change, and don’t let people tell you that you should just accept who you already are. If you are getting what you want out of life, good. If you aren’t getting what you want, and think that changing something about yourself is going to help you get what you want, then do that.

(Source: coheedcx)